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#34: Hypnosis Rocks! Redefining “What’s Next” in Your Midlife Journey

with Lori Hammond
July 20, 2023 | 60 Minutes

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On "Inside-Out Career Design" this week, hosts Nicola Vetter & Peter Axtell speak with Lori Hammond

Hypnosis rocks! Why? Because tapping into the subconscious mind can redefine "what's next" in midlife. You already know that your limiting beliefs are keeping you stuck. The chatter in your head is so loud you can't hear valuable messages from your true inner voice. Hypnosis is a way to bypass the maniac in your head. It's a proven tool to access parts of your mind you can't reach in your usual conscious state. 

Your subconscious mind holds your secret desires you may not be aware of. And in this episode, Lori Hammond, an expert hypnotist, explains how hypnosis and future pacing can help you create the life you want. 

In our conversation, we talk about…

  • secrets and tips for answering the question "What's next?" in YOUR life,
  • how being in a trance state, stops overthinking long enough for positive suggestions to go in and start thinking about a new paradigm and a new way of showing up in the world,
  • why hypnosis is not strange or weird but a powerful tool for change,
  • the fact that most of our limiting beliefs were placed in our minds before age seven, and how to shatter them through hypnosis,
  • the power of her exercise called the Breakthrough Protocol,
  • and a special treat, she guides us through a hypnosis session that we can all do ourselves.

About Lori Hammond

Lori Hammond is a professional hypnotist who works with groups online. 

She quit her lucrative job as a high-end hair stylist several years ago to pursue this new career and to say she was nervous about the transition would be an understatement. 

At first, she didn't have any clients and she was worried she'd missed the boat by switching careers but then she found a coach who helped her gain clarity and massive forward momentum through one tiny tweak. 

Today, Lori enjoys a thriving business, and she is excited about knowing she's making a difference in the world.

One of the hardest things about being a hairstylist was that she had to be behind the chair to make money. Now she can work from anywhere with just a WIFI connection and has clients all over the world. 

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About the Inside-Out Career Design Podcast

This podcast is obsessed with answering a single question: Is it possible to create an authentic, meaningful, and fulfilling life you love while building a successful and rewarding career?

Join Nicola Vetter and Peter Axtell, co-founders of the WhatsNext.com Career Insights platform and creators of the groundbreaking MotivationFinder assessment, as they follow their obsession with answering this question by sharing their insights, discoveries, and life lessons and talking with career experts, leaders, spiritual guides, psychologists, data scientists, coaches -- anyone and everyone who might hold a strategy or answer to the age-old questions of “what’s next for me?” and “what should I do with my life?”

They seek to transform suffering into joy for millions of people stuck and confused in their lives and careers.

Get ready to be inspired, motivated, and above all, to connect deeply with who you are and what you are meant to do with the time you’ve been given.

Transcript

Lori Hammond  00:00

We are always in there. It's just this kind of like, zoned out feel good state that just allows you to stop overthinking long enough for positive suggestions to go in and for you to start thinking about a new paradigm and a new way of showing up in the world.

 

Nicola Vetter  00:17

Hello and welcome to another episode of the Inside-Out Career Design podcast. My name is Nicola Vetter, and I'm here with my co-host and husband, Peter Axtell, and our guest today is Lori Hammond. Lori had a personal crisis a few years ago, when at the age of 43, she wondered, who do I want to be when I grow up, she quit her lucrative job at a high-end salon to become a professional hypnotist. That was quite the change.

 

Peter Axtell  00:56

Lori has struggled to get business for the first couple of years, but then stumbled upon the secret to growing her business through group hypnosis sessions and training programs.

 

Nicola Vetter  01:06

That's why we were curious to talk with Lori. And in our conversation, we talk about secrets and tips for answering the question, what's next in your life, while being in a trance state stops overthinking long enough for positive suggestions to go in and start thinking about a new paradigm and a new way of showing up in the world. Why hypnosis is not strange or weird, but a powerful tool for change. The fact that most of our limiting beliefs were placed in our minds before age seven, and how to shatter them through hypnosis. The power of her exercise called the breakthrough protocol, and a special treat. She guides us through a hypnosis session that we can all do ourselves. It's wonderful. And now it's time to listen and learn from Lori. Welcome, Lori. We're excited to have you on our podcast today because we get to talk about hypnosis. And I think a lot of people, myself included, think that hypnosis is this mysterious thing and certainly fascinating. So how did you decide to become a hypnotist? Tell us about that What's Next moment?

 

Lori Hammond  02:48

Okay. So I decided to become a hypnotist. I obviously had heard of hypnosis before. But I was raised that the religion I was raised in was very anti hypnosis. It basically hypnosis was like it was a sin. And when I started to get curious about hypnosis, I stumbled on a podcast. I had just started listening to podcasts. This was a few years back. I had just started listening to podcasts. And I heard this podcast by a man named Mike Mandel. And he is a hypnosis teacher. And when I first listened to the podcast, I thought that this is ridiculous is the way it works as well. But these guys are crazy. They're like it was entertaining. It was fun to listen to, but I didn't really believe it. And when I decided I went to see a couple hypnotists and I was mostly going for my weight. I had really struggled with my weight. And I had tried everything, nothing had like everything, nothing had worked. And so I decided I was gonna go see a hypnotist and have them hypnotize me to lose weight. I went to see two different hypnotists and I did not click with either of them. The first one I could hear him coming down the hall to come get me and he went. Like he was just so disappointed that he had another client and I thought, this is not making me feel good. And then the second lady, she did hypnosis in her home. And her home. It was decorated in like 1980s, mov and pink and big flowers. And it just reminded me of my childhood home. And so I thought I can't do this. And she actually did a technique on me, which still today is not my favorite technique. It's it. She told me to do a lot of visualizing, and I'm not really a strong visualizer and I was skeptical about hypnosis already because I didn't think I could visualize. But I now know that there are so many ways for hypnosis to work beautifully whether a person is a strong visualizer or not. And after that second appointment, I decided you know what, I'm just going to learn this myself and I signed up for Mike Mandel's hypnosis Academy, it was absolutely life changing. I went and saw them in Las Vegas and went to a conference there called Hypno thoughts. It was, oh my gosh, it was like being in the room as soon as you as soon as I got to the top of the escalator where the conference was being held, I could like feel the love in the air. And I've learned that hypnotists are like the most open-hearted healers, they just love people. And you could feel that. And so I had a talk with Chris Thompson, which is Mike Mandel is associate and I decided on the spot that I actually as soon as he walked away, I signed up to go to Toronto and train with him in Toronto to do his Hypnosis Training there. And I haven't looked back since it's been absolutely amazing. It's it's completely radically changed my life. And so the idea of being able to bring it to others is really inspiring for me.

 

Nicola Vetter  05:56

Can you can you talk a little more about how it changed your life? So what was life before? And how is it now?

 

Lori Hammond  06:04

Yes, so the biggest thing, I had struggled my whole life with depression, like from as early of an ages, I can remember, I had really struggled with depression. And I had tried everything for my depression, I had tried pills, and potions and therapy sessions and reading books. And I had I had like, it was such a prevalent problem in my life. And I had desperately tried to solve it. And so when I learned hypnosis, it was for the weight piece, I wasn't even thinking that I could solve the depression piece. And hypnosis, so amazingly eradicated my depression, that it absolutely changed my life. And it wasn't, it wasn't even something I was trying to do. Just implementing the simple, simple tools to help with depression. She completely like changed who I am as a person. And so I still sometimes struggle with my weight. I'm a little a few pounds heavy right now, but I don't hate myself the way I used to. The it just it helped me so much with that depression piece. And I found that it's equally effective with anxiety with different disorders that just keep people feeling stuck and feeling broken. It transforms a person's life. So that's what made me decide I like I have to do this. This is too cool to not share with the world.

 

Peter Axtell  07:27

I want to drill down a little bit on this. Does that mean that? Is there a lot of skepticism about hypnosis or is it widely used and people don't know about it? Or maybe I just don't know about it as much. You're talking about a major thing. I'm very familiar with people who've had depression. You're talking about a major thing, Lori? Yeah. Tell me, is it widely accepted, or it is not widely accepted?

 

Lori Hammond  07:53

I think that there's a real stigma on hypnosis and people when people hear about hypnosis, I was telling you before we started rolling the camera. I've literally and this was a relative of my at a family reunion. She we were sitting down we're having this great conversation. We're just really building rapport with one another, and she asked me what I do for a living and when I told her I was a hypnotist, she stood up from the table and went like this to me like, like you don't wait for me, you evil person.

 

Peter Axtell  08:25

And for those who are who aren't who are watching aren't watching this video Loise holding both of her fingers crossed, like stay away from me The Exorcist. That's hilarious.

 

Lori Hammond  08:38

Yes. And I've had reactions like that. It's interesting because I think that the tides are turning a little bit. And I when I tell people now what I do, they tend to lean in and get curious and want to know more. A lot of times, they're very skeptical that they're like, oh, hypnosis is cool, but it wouldn't work on me. And what people don't understand is that we are in and out of different kinds of trances all day, every day. And I believe that everyone in the world is hypnotizable. But people experience hypnosis in different ways. So if you've ever seen a stage show where people are clicking like chickens and barking like dogs, not everyone experiences hypnosis in that way. And that's a very context driven kind of hypnosis. That's not what I do. But different people experience hypnosis in different ways. But if a person has ever driven home, and pulled into the driveway and not really remembered the drive there, because they were they were in their own world and kind of zoning out on the way there. That's a form of hypnosis. If you've ever been so immersed in a TV show that you jumped when the bad guy came out or cried when the family dog died, that's hypnosis.

 

Nicola Vetter  09:52

So, what are some myths about hypnosis?

 

Lori Hammond  09:57

So I was raised to believe that hypnosis was evil that it was of the devil, I was not allowed to watch Scooby Doo growing up because it had hypnosis in it. So one of the things that people believe about hypnosis is that it's evil. And again, this is just based on a misunderstanding, and I think part of it is because they've seen the stage shows where they've seen the straight hypnotist, and people seem to be under the command of someone, there's, there's a lot that can be explained about why it looks that way. But um, it, it feels kind of scary, and like the hypnotist is in control. And the cool thing that I've learned about hypnosis is that it's a partnership, and the person who is sitting in the chair is always the person in control. And they can always decide if they're going to cooperate and participate or not, they can say no, they can refuse to close their eyes that you know, all the different things that people that you know, if they say, oh, it's it doesn't work on me, they think I'm going to make them do something. So that's those are a couple of misconceptions about hypnosis is that the hypnotist is making the hypnotic do something. And that's just not the case.

 

Peter Axtell  11:08

And isn't it also true that you can't, you won't do something that you would not morally want to do inside, you're not being taken over? Is that right?

 

Lori Hammond  11:19

That is correct. A person under hypnosis isn't going to take off all their clothes and street down the street, if that's not something that they would normally do, or something that they felt is, you know, morally right for them. So there, we are always in there. It's just this kind of like, zoned out feel good state that just allows you to stop overthinking long enough for positive suggestions to go in. And for you to start thinking about a new paradigm and a new way of showing up in the world.

 

Peter Axtell  11:52

What are the limitations of hypnosis? And what can it do? And what can't it do?

 

Lori Hammond  11:59

Yes, so that that's a really big answer. And it might help to have a little bit of context. But the limitations of hypnosis inside a therapeutic session would be that if a person, okay, let's, let's say that hypnosis is well known for helping people stop smoking, that's not one of the things that I've done a whole lot, I've done a little bit of stop smoking. But um, if a person, their grandmother is a smoker, and she is, she has emphysema, and they're really worried about her. And so someone calls me on the phone and makes an appointment for their grandma. And their grandma comes in, but she's there because her grandson is coercing her into it. And not because she really wants to be there. And not because she really wants to stop smoking, a limitation of hypnosis would be that I cannot make her stop smoking. We have a really clear intake form, and I will only see people, I don't do one on one work anymore, which we can talk about later if you'd like. But before that, I wouldn't see people unless they were coming to me of their own accord. Because it really is up to the person what they're willing to do. Hypnosis can't give a person skills that they don't possess, you know, it can't turn someone into a beautiful ballerina when they're clumsy. I was I have an example. But I'm not gonna say because on the offensive to the example that I have, but it, it really enhances abilities that you already have many of them that you don't know that you have. And one of the coolest things. So a big part of what I do is based in NLP as well neuro linguistic programming, which is a huge part of what I do. And, and the part like I'm really passionate about NLP. And one of the cool things that I learned in NLP is that we all have all these different aspects to our personality. So when you were a little kid, if you were super playful, and you'd love to play and be silly, that's still an aspect of your personality that is in there, but may have gotten squashed out through the way that you've interacted with society since then. But that playful little kid is still in there. And you can think of all these different aspects of the personality like kids in the classroom. And each one of us has about 100 or even more different kids in our classroom. And so I was we just get used to using like the same moving my fingers three or four. And, um, I was so used to being depressed kid like I was so used to, to being depressed that I thought that that's who I was. And you can the way to think about this is only one kid can be standing in the front of the classroom at a time and whatever kid is standing in the front of the classroom is the one who's running the show. So we might get someone you know who comes to us for hypnosis and they have anger issues or they have anxiety issues or they Have drinking issues, whatever it is, it's like, that kid is so used to standing in the front of the classroom, that they don't know how to utilize different aspects of their personality. And through really simple, powerful techniques, most of them actually NLP based, I teach them how to bring a different kid to the front of the classroom. And the cool thing is, when you bring another kid to the front of the classroom, that kid that was standing there has to go sit down, only one kid can be in the front at a time. So it's a powerful way to start to show people how to change aspects of their personality. And then just with repetition, they start to get really good at it. And that starts to be their default state who they show up as.

 

Peter Axtell  15:42

That's amazing.

 

Nicola Vetter  15:43

Wonderful. So the results from hypnosis are they then permanent?

 

Lori Hammond  15:50

That's a great question. So it really depends, it's in situations like smoking, there's often something where, like a moment during hypnosis, or often and even happens before the hypnosis ever starts, when they're when they hit, the therapist is teaching the tools where something shifts inside them, and they're never able to look at a cigarette the same way or something is a mechanism is turned off that used to cause those cravings and all of a sudden, that's gone. And there's no problem anymore ever again. More often than not what I have found, in my experience, it's the often teaching them how to bring a different kid to the front of the classroom, and then what's called future pacing, which is helping them start to think of the times when they are going to bring that different cake to the front of the classroom. So they're armed with the knowledge of how to do it, and we practice how to do it right there in the session. But then they decide, okay, I'm going to do this. As soon as I wake up in the morning, I'm going to do this, whenever I'm starting to run that old drinking program where I used to want to pick up, you know, I used to want to go and pour myself a glass of alcohol. Now I'm going to do this instead. And just teaching them different ways of behaving with their environment in everyday life. So sometimes it's permanent. And it's immediate. And sometimes it's more of a process. But it's always, I shouldn't say always, in my experience, it has it is so much faster than traditional therapy. And I don't have anything against traditional therapy, I think it's a beautiful thing. But often a person is in therapy for months, if not years, and they still are kind of struggling with that thing. Whereas with hypnosis, it's usually within a few sessions, you're starting to, to really experience some amazing transformation.

 

Nicola Vetter  17:35

Wow, that is so helpful. And so needed in these days that we're living in, right?

 

Lori Hammond  17:43

Yes, yes, very much. So. It's so liberating. So many people don't realize that this is available to them. And they think that they're just stuck being the way that they're being and experiencing life, the way they're experiencing life. And there's a whole different option available to them that they just don't realize.

 

Peter Axtell  18:03

What about people really want to know how to overcome their limiting beliefs? In our Figure Out What's Next program, part of the problems that people have identified is how do I get over my limiting beliefs. How does hypnosis help somebody get over their limiting beliefs?

 

Lori Hammond  18:22

Yes, so there's a couple different ways the couple different approaches a person could take. And one is when you're in that kind of trance, doubt, meditative state, if a person has ever experienced meditation, it's really the same state as hypnosis. It's just being relaxed enough that you're not contradicting everything. You're not saying, No, it isn't. And so when a person is in that trancey state, just to start to, to help them, see some new suggestions, start to see some new ways of thinking about the world and start to realize that the time, most of our limiting beliefs were given to us before the age of seven, they were maybe modeled to us by our parents or placed on us by a school teacher. But most of the things that we really believe were actually placed on us before the age of seven. So helping them kind of go in regress into the past and, and realize when they picked up this belief, all of a sudden, that shatters the belief. It really depends on the person. But there's a second way to do this. And this is the way that I personally have done it. I'm not a very good hypnotic subject. I shouldn't say that out loud. Any of my colleagues that are listening are probably going to say Shame on you for saying that. But what I have learned about the way the brain works, I've always been kind of a neuroscience geek. Understanding the brain works. how the brain works in this new way has been so empowering for me that it's allowed me to change my life. So for me with limiting beliefs, and I, oh man, I had some big ones regarding starting my business. I was terrified to start my business and the best way to overcome those limiting beliefs is just to start doing it. It's just to take action. I sat down in a coffee shop, and I can tell you about this if you would like when we're talking about what's you know what's next and did a journaling exercise that helped me understand. It's okay to go for your dreams, it's okay to dream big, it's okay to try this stuff, you are worthy of having an excellent life. And those all went against my limiting beliefs, which is that I'm not good enough. But there comes a point where we just have to start stepping into it, we just have to start acting as if, and then letting the proof that we are worthy of living that good life start to catch up with us and we start to see evidence of it in our life. If we wait to feel like it, we'll probably never do it.

 

Peter Axtell  20:48

Well, so you offer what you call the breakthrough protocol. So tell us about that. And tell us how it works.

 

Lori Hammond  20:59

Okay, so the breakthrough protocol is actually based on a protocol that I learned from Tony Robbins, and it's like, one or two minutes when he does it, and you can, you could find it, I'm trying to remember what I can't remember what he calls it. He doesn't call it the breakthrough protocol. But it's a really short little protocol. And my breakthrough protocol is about 40 minutes long. And what it does is it takes a person through their life, it's basically like, the ghost of Christmas past Christmas present and your Christmas future. And so you take a person into the past, and you show them, okay, this limiting belief, you have what you know, this, this path that you're on, this is where it's caused you pain in the past, this is where it's like messed up your life, this is where it's affected your friendships, this is where it's affected your self-esteem. Maybe this is where it's affected your weight, your level of addiction, this, the breakthrough protocol is really good for people who struggle with addictions, and just helping them realize all the ways it's caused their life to be hard in the past, and then taking them to the present and having them look in the mirror and realize this is like, this feels terrible because of this, and this and this, and it's really bringing up it this, this one is hard for me to do, because it's really bringing up all the terrible feelings that are associated with that habit that you want to break, whether it's a mindset or an action, whatever it is. And then you take them into the future and say, Okay, if you continue to do this, this is how your life is going to be. Take the weight of all of those bad decisions, or all of those unhelpful decisions, and bring it with you into the future. And notice how it feels. Notice how heavy it is. Notice how discouraged you feel, and just really helping them to feel the pain of those decisions. And what this does is it actually helps the person understand I'm in charge of my decisions, like I have felt like a victim. But through hypnosis, they start to realize they can bring a different kid to the front of the classroom. And they start to take accountability for their own actions, which isn't to say there aren't sometimes extenuating circumstances. But for most people, it's a decision that they've made over and over and over. And it's just become so automatic, that it's a habit, not necessarily an addiction, but a habit. So then you bring them back to the present, and you say, guess what, you're free, you want to choose it, let all that weight fall off of you be free right now. And now I want you to imagine putting on that new decision putting on that new lifestyle, you know, letting that addiction go, whatever it is, and you bring them into the future, feeling that amazing feeling. I'm experiencing what it's like to have that amazing belief. And what this does is it actually starts to code into a person's very DNA, what it's like to make different decisions. And we're doing this thing called future pacing, which is putting them in future situations that they're going to be in, but bringing this amazing resource in with them and realizing how different life can be, how different their decisions can be, how different their interaction with other people can be. And helping them to encode the breakthrough protocol is so powerful because it it literally starts to encode new ways of showing up in the world into a person's DNA as they're sitting in that session.

 

Nicola Vetter  24:25

It really sounds like this could help someone who's trying to figure out what's next. A whole bunch, on a completely different level than how we teach it. So that's pretty interesting. Wow. So Lori, you spoke about that you don't do one on one anymore, but you do a Group Hypnosis on Zoom.

 

Lori Hammond  24:51

Yes.

 

Nicola Vetter  24:52

Why did you change from the one-on-one approach to group and how does it work in a group?

 

Lori Hammond  25:01

Okay, great question. So when I was looking for what's next I was a hairstylist, I worked at a high end salon, I absolutely loved my job, I had actually wanted to be a hairstylist ever since I was a little girl. And to make a very long story very short, after my divorce, I decided to go for it and become a hairstylist and I loved it. However, another one of my childhood dreams was to travel the world and to like have new experiences. And I knew there was this really narrow window of time between when my kids were grown. And when I was going to start having grandbabies in the picture. And I wanted to get out there and travel while I was free to do so. And I couldn't because in order to make money, I had to be behind the chair to make money. I had to be in a certain place with a certain person. And so I started asking myself, and I will tell you, I can't remember where I heard this thing. But the quality of our questions determines the quality of our life. And I, I had heard that question. I thought, Okay, what's the right question for this situation? And I started asking myself, How can I make an excellent living, and stop trading time for money, and not have to be location dependent in order to do it. And I just started looking for ideas everywhere I was what those questions do is a tune what's called the reticular activating system, which is the part of us that notices things. So it had me start noticing opportunities in my life. And as I was asking this question, it had been a few months that I had been asking this question. That's when I started studying hypnosis. And so I'm setting hypnosis, and it's changing my life. And I'm like, I wonder if this could work, you know, over zoom, because I had just discovered zoom, I can't even remember now, why I knew what zoom was. Because this is way pre pandemic, when most people didn't know what zoom was. And I started to think I wonder if this could work in a group setting. And I had, like I had visited Europe once. As I as a hairstylist, it was actually Well anyway, I had visited Europe once, but I just had such a heart for Europeans. And I love Europe. And I thought it'd be so cool if I could work with people in Europe over zoom, because obviously, they're not going to come and see me in person in Denver, Colorado. And I started looking into this. And so when I, when I started hypnosis, I felt like I had to jump through certain hoops because I was a beginner. So I had to start by doing one on one sessions. And I did some of those over zoom, and I did some of those in person. And I will tell you that the Zoom sessions were just as well for hypnosis. Because a person can be in their own environment, they can relax even more deeply, they feel more comfortable. They don't have to acclimate to a mob office with a lot of flowers. And they, they're just in their own environment. So hypnosis works really well over zoom. And I knew that, but I wasn't sure how it would work in a group setting. And I read a book, someone recommended the book to me. It's called the power of eight. And I can't remember the author's name offhand. But it was a life changing book. And I mentioned earlier, I'm kind of a science geek. I love hearing about studies, and you know, proof that something works. And this book is full of all of the studies that all of these experiments that the author did to see what happens when a group of people comes together with a common intention and sends that common intention somewhere else. So it's, in some ways it could almost be thought of as prayer. And the book was so compelling, and it showed such miraculous proof that groups often work even better than one on one sessions, that I closed my door and one on one sessions right as I finished that book, I closed my door on one-on-one sessions. I said I'm not doing them anymore. I'm just doing my group sessions. And I haven't looked back since and, and it was the best decision I ever made. I freakin’ love my group sessions. And it's been a really fun journey.

 

Peter Axtell  29:10

So Lori, I'm sure that you have some advice on people who are stuck. We experience this a lot with our clients, people in midlife, and they tell me over and over again, they just feel stuck. I bet you have something to say about that.

 

Lori Hammond  29:25

I do. So I had first of all, I was married for 15 years and the entire time during my marriage. I was a stay-at-home mom, I did not work I did not have I had a high school education. And so as a hairstylist when I started thinking about doing something different, moving into a different sphere, doing hypnosis, it was really intimidating for me and as I mentioned earlier, I have a lot of limiting beliefs. I felt very stuck. I was so terrified to try to make a name for myself in a different arena and to essentially give my notice 60 times because I hadn't told every single client, this is going to be our last appointment together, I'm going to do something else was really intimidating for me. And so I mentioned that I was super into podcasts. I'm still super into podcasts. But I was listening to Tim Ferriss, his podcast, and he was talking about an exercise he called fear setting. And this is what I call my coffee shop conversion. And I'm happy to send it to anyone who wants it. But the coffee shop conversion is, it's a series of questions where you essentially sit down and I went to a coffee shop, this is the reason why. And I wrote down I journaled the answers because there's something that's triggered in our brains, we light up a different area of the brain when we physically write something rather than type it. And so I physically wrote the answers to the questions. And it's, it's essentially, like, if I decide to do this, if I decide to quit my job as a hairstylist and become a hypnotist, what's the worst thing that could happen? And so I'm writing about the worst thing that can happen again, all my kids are grown. I started to realize, as I wrote, the only person that I'm going to make life hard for is myself, if I do this, it's not going to impact anyone else. And of course, it is because what happens in our life impacts others, but really, the biggest impact is going to be to me. And then it asks, if that happens, what can I do to make it okay? And I thought I Okay, the worst thing that could happen is that I stink at this, I don't get any clients, I lose out and I have to go back to being a hairstylist. I love being a hairstylist. That's, that's really not that bad. So I started, right there, I'm thinking, I actually can't do this, I could do this. And like, my heart is pounding. And I have this fear in the pit of my stomach and the thought of like, telling my boss telling the salon owner giving my notice to all my different clients. It's so scary for me to think of, but I'm starting to realize I think I could do this. And then the next question is, what's the worst thing that can happen if you don't do it? And here I started to remember all the times when I've heard when a person is on their deathbed at the end of their life, the thing that they regret is not going for their dreams. It's not trying stuff out. It's you know, wasting your life. I just this morning on my, on my walk this morning, heard this guy say, Do you know how long you're dead for? You're dead for a really long time, you're only alive for a little blip of time. Use that wisely. Like, go for it. I'm getting goosebumps, I'm talking myself into goosebumps. And so I started to realize, Okay, I've got to do this. Because if I don't, I'm going to regret it my whole life, I'm going to regret the idea of knowing that I can tell people, there's a way out of depression. And then I don't do it or telling people there's a way out of anxiety, and then I don't do it. And so I decided to go for it. And it's so crazy. Because as I was doing this journaling exercise, there was someone at the table right next to me, it was like a group of people at the table next to me. And they were talking about making life decisions. And they were talking about going for things. Like they were talking about the exact thing that I was journaling. And I thought what are the odds, this feels like divine intervention. And right, as I wrote in my journal, I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna go for it. I looked up and there was, so I was sitting outside the coffee shop and the outdoor seating area. And there was a little rock sitting on the pedestal of the table that was painted that like, I don't know, if people are still doing this, but back then people would like paint these rocks and leave them around for people to find and take. And I thought, oh my gosh, this is such like this commemorates my decision. I would love to keep that rock just as a like a physical reminder that this is what I'm supposed to do. But I wasn't sure if I should take it. I wasn't sure if it was for taking. And just as I'm thinking this, this mom walks by with like, four kids behind her like this row of ducklings behind her and one of the kids says, Mom, look, it's still there. There's my rock that I painted. Nobody's taken it yet. And it's like, okay, I know, I'm allowed to take it. So, um, I took that rock as a way to commemorate Mike. This is a decision that I was meant to make. And I mentioned that I was raised in a really strictly religious household, and I kind of stepped away from that religion. So I don't I'm not I don't ascribe to any specific religion. But to me, it felt like something or someone bigger than me was looking out for me and was taking care of me and was telling me Stop putting your dream on the backburner. Her go for it. And that's been there been so many times when I've been scared. I actually went on a podcast, it was a podcast that I listened to, that has to do with hypnosis. And I had listened to it. And I kind of idolized this guy and thought, Oh, this is so cool. And he invited me on his podcast. And when I got to the end of a podcast, I just felt like such an idiot. I thought, Oh, I shouldn't have said that. I shouldn't have said that. That was ridiculous. I shouldn't have said that. And just thinking, okay. And I was out at a concert, I was listening to live music, and I couldn't focus on any of it. Because I was thinking, I'm gonna go home, I'm going to take all of my stuff offline, I'm going to close the doors on my business, I'm going to go back to being a hairstylist, and I'm just going to hide, I'm going to message him and say, Please don't put that podcast up, because I felt so embarrassed of it. And having that rock and remembering, No, this is what you're supposed to do. You get to be brave, you get to, you get to make mistakes. And it's funny, because when the podcast that came out, I got tons of positive feedback about it, it was totally fine. But um, it was just a reminder that, that we are meant to show up in this world, we are meant to shine, we're meant to go for it that, you know, we get used to being a certain way in the world, we get used to having a certain job in the world, we get used to, you know, whatever it is that we're doing. And when we start to think what if I could do this, it's like, we immediately get smacked back into line. And when we start to let ourselves dream and think, What if like, what if I get to change the kid in the front of the classroom and be somebody different, and show up in a different way? It's like everything changes.

 

Nicola Vetter  36:46

That's so beautifully said, Lori, and I'm wondering, so you did dive in, and you did it. Now there are many, many people out there that are procrastinating sometimes because of life's overwhelm. That's what they say. If you had just one tip, what would you tell them how to just stop procrastinating?

 

Lori Hammond  37:15

Yeah. So I think, before I give the tip, I'm going to pre-frame it by reminding people what I said earlier, which is, there's a good chance, you're never going to feel like it. If you wait till you feel ready, you're never going to do it. And so the one tip that I would give someone, it's just the one thing that impacted me so much when I heard it on my walk this morning is you're going to be dead for a long time. You're only alive for this little blip of time. And sometimes we take ourselves so seriously, and we take life. So seriously, we are the center of our own movie, but there's so many people out there that aren't even paying attention to us because they're the center of their movie. And we think that people are gonna judge us. And we think that people are going to criticize us for our choices when most of the time they're not even paying attention to us. So I just want to encourage you to go for it to realize that life is short, to fast forward to the end of your life. Here's my one piece of advice. Fast forward to the end of your life. And imagine looking back at this moment, and thinking, Oh, I wish I would have done it and give yourself advice from that deathbed place.

 

Peter Axtell  38:22

I was listening to a Sam Harris podcast. And he described something I've never forgotten that we use now, he was complaining that he was stuck in a big traffic jam in LA and he was late for his appointment. And if anybody doesn't know Sam Harris, he's a very successful guy. And his friend looks at him and says, Sam, do you realize that there's probably 2 billion people in the world who would give anything to trade places with you. They'd give anything to be in a car that runs, they'd do anything to be stuck in traffic in LA with the sun shining and food in the refrigerator, and Sam just went kind of Oh...

 

Lori Hammond  39:06

Yeah.

 

Peter Axtell  39:09

I use that all the time to really get present to, wow, there's a million people who would trade places with me in a heartbeat.

 

Lori Hammond  39:18

I needed to hear that right now. That's really good. Yeah.

 

Nicola Vetter  39:23

Now, I was wondering, so many people that are procrastinating might also suffer from the imposter syndrome, or would you call the imposter monster?

 

Lori Hammond  39:39

Yes.

 

Nicola Vetter  39:40

And you even have a podcast with the same name. How do you help people get rid of that imposter monster?

 

Lori Hammond  39:51

That is a great question. So yes, my podcast is silent. The imposter monster and I just brought a bunch mostly hypnotists on there, too. who have the same imposter syndrome? And some of them are some of the most well-known, top hypnotist in the world. And like everyone who knows anything about hypnosis knows these people. And they've all talked about how they struggle with impostor syndrome, too. So my answer, and this is something I've given a great deal of thought. And based on my observation from people who struggle with impostor syndrome, this is the conclusion that I've come to so I don't 100% of this is true, but I think it's true. I don't think the imposter monster ever goes away. I really don't. And I wish that I could tell you that he did. And I wish that I could tell you that people get over imposter syndrome. And they, they are okay. But I don't think that happens. And so what I think you need to do is make friends with that imposter monster. Mine is like a little guy that sits on my shoulder right here and talks in my ear. And so it's just hearing that voice saying, you can't do it, you're not good enough, so and so is going to judge you, whatever it is, and just saying, Okay, I hear you, I hear you, and I'm going to do it anyway. And just doing it through the imposter syndrome, I think that's the best way to move past it. Because it's not until you start to get some proof that you can do it, that you start to do more that you start to do a little more, and that you actually start to recognize that imposter monster voice as the voice that says, What if you can, like do more, keep going. And that scary voice starts to be the voice that spurs you to action?

 

Peter Axtell  41:41

Well, you've landed on something I'm extremely passionate about in our Figure Out What's Next program we teach about the voice in your head, it's what we call the egoic voice. It's that voice that never shuts up. And I have done a lot of thinking and studying and teaching about this. And really, if you think about that voice in your head, it's really designed to keep you in fear, to keep you from moving forward. Steven Pressfield calls that the voice of resistance, particularly when you're going to do something, say make a career change or something, then the voice will really start to scream, because it doesn't want you to move forward, whoever designed this, very bad programming, we need some AI to improve this egoic voice thing but you're absolutely right, you cannot get rid of it. Because you have this inner roommate. That's a maniac that you are living with, a maniac. But you can't get rid of the maniac. So how do you deal with the maniac? And of course, what we teach is that you can't get rid of it and you don't want to make it your enemy either. And you can learn through awareness to start analyzing what the voice is actually saying. And we teach it by externalizing it and giving it a name. So mines name is Heinz. And so unfortunately, this was before I met Nicola and Nicholas Father's name is Heinz, it was just so unfortunate. It came from a Heinz ketchup bottle in Sebastopol, California. That's how I came up with the name Heinz, but externalizing it and giving it a name, then you can hear it talking to you. And then you hear what that's absolutely ridiculous. But you have to get some distance from it. And what I'm wondering is this is very closely aligned to imposter syndrome. Because it's got to be that same message from your egoic voice that tells you that you're a fraud and all the rest of it. And we also agree that you will probably never get rid of it completely. But you can learn to attenuate it and tone it down. But you caused me to think about another question. Do you think there's any way that the imposter syndrome could be used as an ally? Is there any upside or anything? I don't know.

 

Lori Hammond  43:51

That's a great question. And I haven't thought about it a great deal. In a way I think it can just simply because we can start to think of that voice as something that helps us realize, okay, I heard this voice before I did this scary thing, I was successful. This scary voice actually means that it's time to do the scary thing and see if I'm successful. And I think we get so afraid of failure. But what failure is, is it's proof that we're in the arena, we're doing it we're trying it out. And so I think that changing our relationship with failure and thinking of it as feedback can change things too. So when that voice is saying you're gonna fail, you're gonna fail. We realize, okay, maybe I am. I'll just get back up and keep going.

 

Nicola Vetter  44:43

I want to touch on another subject, self-hypnosis. How can you access your subconscious mind through self-hypnosis? Can you share some of the techniques that you teach? And what are actually the conditions for self-hypnosis to work?

 

Lori Hammond  45:05

Okay, that's a great question. There's a couple of different approaches that a person can take. And I'll go over each because I think they're both very valid. The first is to learn to put yourself into a trance state, and actually go into hypnosis with an intention. And here's the tricky part when we're in hypnosis, where essentially, the object of the game is to quiet the over analytical like chatty part of us, the part of us that is analyzing stuff and saying, Yeah, but trying to come up with reasons for why we do what we do, when really those reasons are probably total BS, because they're coming from up here. So it's to quiet that part of us and then to just let the changes begin to happen. So rather than trying to be in self-hypnosis and direct yourself and tell yourself things while you're in there, because you want the telling yourself things part of yourself to be quiet, you set an intention at the beginning, okay, I'm going to go into hypnosis for X amount of time. And I learned this from Mike Mandel, I'm going to go into hypnosis for X amount of time, with the objective of not craving cigarettes anymore, or you know, whatever it is that you're wanting to accomplish, and self-hypnosis. And then you just go into that trance state and let the unconscious mind the part of us that knows the things we don't realize, we know, that has the resources, we don't realize we have started to make those changes on our behalf. So that's one form of self-hypnosis, that's incredibly powerful. Another form, and this is probably what I use more often is more based in NLP. And I believe I've actually taught classes on this, I believe this is the most powerful form of self-hypnosis in the world. And it's called this three B's, body language, breathing, and belief. So when we change our body language, we bring a different kid to the classroom to the front of the classroom. Like if you if you look at somebody and they're doing this, you know, they're depressed, like, you know, depressed kid is in the front of the classroom. But if you look at someone, and they're doing this, like, that's a totally different, you can't do this, and be depressed. So when a person changes their body language, they change their facial expression, they change their posture. And, and I recommend doing it in this order. So if a person has ever tried affirmations, and affirmations haven't worked for you, that's because that's really the third beat, you need to choose switch the other two B's first, so you change your body language, and then you change your breathing. And one of the most powerful breathing techniques I learned from Dr. Andrew Huberman, and it's called the physiological side, and it's a double inhale through the nose, and a long exhale through the mouth. So it looks like this. And hopefully, people on the radio can hear I'll get close to my mic. And all you need, oh my gosh, right. Like, I feel that right now, all you need is between one and three of these physiological size, and you're set. And then the third B is belief and all beliefs are is our self-talk, we think that our beliefs are stuck, we think that they are who we are, when really, it's just thing that we repeated over and over again. And oftentimes it was given to us by someone in the past, who's who might not even be around anymore. Just because they thought that was true. So they taught it to us as a belief. And so that's where you start to plug in affirmations or just think, okay, if I was confident kid, what would confident kids say, and the simpler and more elementary school you keep it, the better it works, when we come up with these flowery, convoluted flowy affirmations. They don't work as well as something simple, like, I can do this. I can do this. Something, you know, something really simple. But if we, you know, if we're doing this, these are three, or you know, two of our B's, and then we say I can do this, our body's not going to believe us. But if we say, I can do this, everything shifts.

 

Nicola Vetter  49:18

For those that are just listening to this podcast and not seeing it. It is really a gesture of opening your body with both arms. And in this stance, You can't say, I'm so depressed. I'm so depressed. You know, it's just feeling small and making yourself small with your body. That is what keeps you in a depressed state.

 

Lori Hammond  49:49

Yeah, for sure. And one of the things that I'll direct people to do is to imagine that there's a string like a magic string coming from the top of their head and going through their body and they Pull up on the string. And it lets their bones align, it lets their shoulders come back, it lets their chin come up. And it just aligns everything. And that's something that you don't have to have a visual to see. But you can pretend it right now you can even pull up on the top of your head and pretend you're pulling up on a string. And that immediately starts to open up. Um, you know, depending on how woo woo you want to get it opens up the chakras, it just starts to open up a flow that allows you to take a nice deep breath, and to start to tell yourself something new and to start to say, even if it's as simple as like, what if, what if I can? What if life doesn't have to be this way? Like, what if? And everything shifts?

 

Nicola Vetter  50:44

Yeah, what if... those are two so powerful words I think. Now, we are reaching the hour. And I would like to discuss one more thing, which I bet many people, especially in midlife, are very curious about, and you mentioned it at the very beginning. And that is that you offer a program, weight loss without willpower, which I think you call trancy pants, just like your website. Tell us a little more about that.

 

Lori Hammond  51:21

Yes, so I have a couple different weight loss programs. Weight loss without willpower is one that I created years ago. And I love that there are so many simple solutions, just like I'm sharing, just like I've shared throughout this podcast, there's so many simple solutions that we can use with weight loss. In fact, many of the things that I've shared on this podcast today can be applied to weight loss. But weight loss without willpower is a program that lets people start to experience freedom with food starts to experience freedom with their decisions. There's not necessarily food rules in there, because I think everybody is different. And many of us know what good nutrition is, but we choose to eat the I'm not even gonna say the crappy foods that we sometimes choose to eat. So it's making decisions in the moment, it's finding those little shut off switches that allow you to catch yourself mid craving and say, Nope, I'm gonna go a different way. Even if it's like in the middle of a meal when you want to finish everything on your plate, but you know, you're satisfied there are shut off switches that I give you that let you turn off that urge that you turn off a craving right in the middle so that you can move forward and be the person you want to be and stop putting your life on hold and fit in the clothes you want to fit in and to really thrive. It's a beautiful program. And transy pants so that's, that's one thing I went into a trance to think of that name. I was trying to think of a website name someone has taken Laurie hammond.com I'm like on a mission to get whoever that Lori Hammond is out there to let me have the website because she's not using it. But Lori Hammond that .COM was taken. And so I just I said okay, I'm gonna go into a trance for five minutes with the intent of coming up with a cute catchy name for my website because that's not something I'm naturally good at. And that's when I came up with trancy pants so my website is trade see pans.com

 

Peter Axtell  53:22

Lori, you mentioned I went into a trance, I have more questions for you by the way, but you say how to go into a trance. Now I'm asking myself, How do I actually go into a trance? Teach me how to go into a trance all by myself.

 

Lori Hammond  53:38

Okay, I love this question. So this is where many people will realize they're already good at this. So if you've ever been sitting and zoning out, I remember in in grade school kids used to make fun of kids that would go into a trance during school, so they might just be sitting there. And if you can't see me, I'm just kind of like my head is rested on my hand and I'm just kind of almost looking through the object in front of me. And that's a form of trance. So if a person wants to get good at going into trance one of the coolest ways to do this, is it okay if I if I guide people into a quick trance?

 

Peter Axtell  54:14

Let's do it right now.

 

Lori Hammond  54:15

Okay. Okay. So this is one of my favorite ways because it just feels amazing to me, and that is to just get into a comfortable position. So obviously, don't do this while you're driving or working any machinery but when you're in a comfortable private place, just get into a comfortable position you can be sitting up or lying down. And just begin to notice your thumbs. Make sure your hands are not crossed that they're uncrossed maybe resting in your lap. And just notice your thumbs and imagine there's space inside your thumbs and notice the space around your thumbs. And then notice your first finger and imagine their space inside that finger. And notice the space around that finger. And notice the space between that finger and that thumb. And then move to your ring finger, I'm sorry, your middle finger, and notice the space inside that finger, the space around that finger, the space between that finger and that thumb. And then move to your ring finger. And notice the space inside that finger. The space around that finger. Imagine that you could feel the space between that finger and your thumb. And then in the little finger, notice the space and the little finger. The space around that finger the space between that finger and the thumb. The space inside the hands. The space inside the arms. You can notice the space inside your feet. The toes, the different parts of the feet, just notice your feet filled with space. Notice the space around your feet, the space between your feet, the space inside your legs, the space inside your lower torso from the waist down. The space inside your upper torso, your back, the space in your neck. The Space in your face. The space inside your head and even the follicles of hair. Notice the space in your hair. And just notice the space around your body. And in this space, you can think of very simple suggestion to yourself like I am okay. All is well. What if something amazing is about to happen to me? What if life is really good. And now you can just shake, shake your hands a little bit, come back fully to this moment, open your eyes. Let yourself be wide awake, refreshed and alert and know that you've just experienced hypnosis. And it really can be that easy. And this is something you can do on your own as well.

 

Nicola Vetter  57:36

Oh, I was trying hard not to go into hypnosis because I saw Peter totally zoning out. I will listen back to this and I'll do it. Thank you, thank you.

 

Lori Hammond  57:54

I was going a little bit faster than normal because I know we're getting to the hour. But it's a beautiful protocol. And you can do that on your own, you can just lay there and relax, hands and feet separated are is best. And just let yourself feel the space and let yourself go into that beautiful trancy place.

 

Nicola Vetter  58:14

Okay, Lori. So we are getting to an end now, really. But I want to give you the opportunity if there's anything that we didn't touch on that you really want our audience to know.

 

Lori Hammond  58:26

Okay, I think we've covered the things that are most near and dear to my heart. The final thing that I would want to leave people with is just to understand life is short. We only get one go with this, depending on your belief, you know, we only get one go in this life right here for sure. And so let yourself people let yourself like stop waiting and start making some decisions that allow you to live a life of your dreams. And if you fail, that's just feedback. It's okay. You are worthy of living an excellent life you are worthy of trying things out. And I hope that you... I can't wait to see what you do.

 

Peter Axtell  59:09

You made me speechless for a change.

 

Nicola Vetter  59:11

Oh, that's, that's really something.

 

Peter Axtell  59:15

This has been a really special conversation as we knew it would be. So thank you for how you helped us and all the people that you help, and how you'll help our audience. I'm nothing but grateful.

 

Lori Hammond  59:27

Well, thank you Peter and Nicola, I've been really delighted to be here. I was looking forward to and it exceeded my expectations. So thank you.

 

Peter Axtell  59:35

Great.

 

Nicola Vetter  59:35

Wonderful.

 

Peter Axtell  59:38

We hope you enjoyed this interview. If you did, could you do us a favor and hit the like button and subscribe to our channel. It will help the channel grow and get more visibility for Lori, too. To learn more about Lori, head to whatsnext.com/34 where we share links and more. Again that's whatsnext.com/34.

 

Nicola Vetter  1:00:05

Thanks for joining us today. And please share this episode with someone you care about someone who might struggle with limiting beliefs and feeling stuck. And if you are trying to figure out what's next for you, join us for one of our live online workshops, where we teach how to successfully reinvent your career in midlife. To save your spot in our next workshop go to whatsnext.com/workshops. We'll see you there or for another episode here.